


Second chances

by WritingforTheAvengers



Category: Avengers, Falcon - Fandom, Marvel, Sam Wilson - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Fluffy at times, I suck at summaries sorry, Mentions of Death, Mentions of Substance Abuse, angsty, mentions of abusive family, mentions of drug abuse, overall a rollercoaster
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-08
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2020-08-11 18:08:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 18,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20157847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingforTheAvengers/pseuds/WritingforTheAvengers
Summary: If someone would've told you you'd have a kid in your thirties, you wouldn't have believed it. But life had something prepared for you when your beloved twin made the decision to take her own life, leaving her one-year-old, Harley, at your care. Back then, you couldn't even take care of yourself; now, with a 7 year old by yuor side, you have things far more clear. A rainy day at St. John's Cemetary is about to bring more than a droplets of water.





	1. Chapter 1

“Harley, come on!” You yelled from the kitchen. “Hurry up, or we’ll be late again!”

“I don’t even wanna go to school,” a sleepy-faced 7 year old appeared from behind the counter and sat on the stool that was nearest you. It wasn’t really that late, you were actually on time, for a change, but a little bit of pressure would do him no harm. “(Y/N), why do I have to go?”

“Because your grandma and I pay big money for it, besides we didn’t call Hannah yesterday,” you placed a mug of milk in front of him. “So no one can take care of you today.”

“You should’ve called her,” Harley pouted. “Then she would be here and we would play and have fun, instead of me being at that boring school.”

“I know school sucks,” you thumbed his cheek and sighed, “but there’s nothing we can do. Besides, I don’t like you missing school days for no reason at all. Being sick is the only thing I will allow—and your birthday, but this year it’s on a Saturday, so no missing school, mister—” Harley was about to interrupt you, but you spoke quicker—“not even for your birthday eve, Harls.”

He huffed loudly. “I can go to work with you,” he stirred some cocoa on the liquid and munched on a toast. “I promise I’ll behave.”

“I find that a bit hard to believe,” you chuckled lightly. “Come on, baby, eat your breakfast. We’re gonna go see your mom after school, okay?” His reply was a cheerful hum, since his mouth was full of food. “The office car is gonna get us to school, alright? But he’s coming in like 5 minutes, so hurry,” you tapped on the counter and went to wash your own cup. 

As expected, the car did arrive after 5 minutes. You two hurried down the stairs and said hi to the driver. He had been assigned to drive you around just recently, and since you weren’t used to, he didn’t have that much of a job; you did often ask him to bring you things to eat, but if he proved worthy, he might be promoted to picking Harley up from school. You made a mental note on that, but almost unconsciously, you were taken out your notebook to jot it down.

“Harls,” you softly elbowed the kid who was mesmerized with New York City, even though he had lived there his whole life, he was always looking through the window as if it was the first time he saw the buildings. “Babe,” you called again and he turned his head to you, “do you have anything to do this week? Something we need to buy for school?”

“Mmm… not that I can think of,” he tapped his chin. “But next week is the parents and teachers meeting. Ms. Daniels told us to remind the parents, though she sent an email yesterday,” you nodded and jotted that down. “I have a project in two weeks more, it’s a family tree…” he said almost guiltily. “I asked if I could get out of that, but Ms. Daniels said no, I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry for? I have pictures of our family,” you smiled lightly. “You know what? We’re gonna make the most awesome family tree, and we can put some real leaves, and twigs, and crap like that, would you like that?” He nodded cheerfully. “Don’t be sad about it, okay? Do you remember Lilo and Stitch, the movie? Well, Lilo and her sister were a family too, even though their parents weren’t there with them. You and I are a family, and your parents are part of your family, they will always be.”

“And _your_ parents?”

“Yeah, they can be in the tree too,” you joked. “Do you know who else can be part of our family?” You asked, rising your eyebrows. “Hannah—you like her, right?” Harley nodded. “Yeah, we can add her, and we can add George, he’s new to the family, but he’s a good one, right?”

“Yeah!” Harley cheered. “George,” he fidgeted closer to the driver’s seat and spoke to the ever-watching man, “would you like to be included in our family tree?”

“It would be my genuine pleasure, Harley,” the middle-aged man smiled and nodded.

“You can call me Harls,” the little boy assured him. “The members of my family call me like that,” in a matter of a few seconds, George won your heart and your trust. 

“George, can I ask you something?” The driver nodded. “There are some days in which I might have to work until later and I won’t be able to pick Harley up form school, would it be too much to ask you if you could pick him up those days and bring him to the office or take him home? I would call you in advance to see if you’re available, and I would let the school know you’re going, and in case I decide to send this little one home, I would let our nanny know too… would that be okay?”

“Miss de Clare,” George chuckled, “you barely need me on an everyday basis, I’m sure I will be free whenever you need me. I will personally take care of that if necessary,” he assured you.

“Thank you so much,” you sighed in relief. “You’ve saved my life.”

“I can pick you up every day at the same time so you don’t be late for school,” George suggested, knowing you would say yes.

“That would be awesome!” Harley clapped his hands, and now you didn’t have excuses to be late anymore. The happiest one would probably be Ms. Daniels.


	2. The visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As you waited for Harley to come out, you checked your work for tomorrow. There wasn’t much to do, so it would be a light day, light enough for you to start preparing for Harley’s family tree project. You had pictures saved on the deepest sea of your memories, and it was kinda hard to dig all that up.

As you waited for Harley to come out, you checked your work for tomorrow. There wasn’t much to do, so it would be a light day, light enough for you to start preparing for Harley’s family tree project. You had pictures saved on the deepest sea of your memories, and it was kinda hard to dig all that up. 

A cheerful boy ran towards you and wrapped his arms around your waist. Needless to say, you were happy to see him too.

“Did you have fun today?” You grabbed one of your umbrellas and gave it to him, but since yours was big enough for you two, you walked together hand in hand towards the station. 

“Why can’t we call George to pick us up and take us there?” Harley asked, loosening his awkward uniform. “We have a driver, we’re fancy.”

“Technically, George is my driver, and he’s not hired to make trips like these. We’re not going home, and we’re not going to work either. Don’t get accustomed, I might lose my job one day,” you reminded him, “and don’t get lazy, we cannot call him all the time. He’s got a life, and so do we.”

“But it’s one hour to go see mom! And then we have to travel one more hour to get home, how do you expect me to do my homework?”

“Harley, it’s 3 pm, and you’re gonna sleep the whole way there and the whole way back,” you laughed heartedly. “You won’t even be tired once we get home, besides, how much homework can you have in second grade? If we don’t get to do all of your homework later today, I’ll write a note to Ms. Daniels to explain her what happened, but until then, no more complaints. Plus, you’ve got your book for school, you can read some in the subway.”

Harley fought to stay awake for some minutes, but fell asleep about 15 after you got on the public transport that would take you from Trinity School to St. John’s Cemetery. You grabbed his hand and woke him up. 

The boy was always excited to see his parents so he took out the umbrella from his bag and ran off under the rain. You followed him calmly, since there weren’t many people that day. Soon, you found him talking to the graves, showing them a drawing he had done at school and telling them about the family tree project he had to do. 

“… (Y/N) said she’d help me with it, we might have to ask grandma for more pictures of our family, maybe your aunts and grandparents?” He shrugged.

“I might have to break into grandma’s house like I’m a spy,” you told him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Although if you talk to her she might help us willingly.”

“We can call her later,” Harley looked at you and you smiled and nodded. 

You stayed there a few more minutes and walked towards the entrance to get back home. It became a bit windy, and in a matter of seconds, Harley’s umbrella was flying away. You told him to stay put with your umbrella and ran after the damned thing. Luckily, there was a guy holding it and looking around him to see if anyone had lost it. Then, he saw you.

“Man, these things are alive nowadays,” he shook his head as you approached him. “Here you go,” he closed it and handed it to you. 

“Thanks,” you breathed. “Yeah, these things come to live every once in a while,” you chuckled.

“Is it yours? Looks kind of childish, if you ask me…” he examined it.

“No, it’s not mine,” you shook your head. You turned to Harley, who was not far, and made a beckoning sign at him to get closer. “It’s his, actually—the little guy who’s running here.”

“Hey, get under this, you’re gonna get wet—” he grabbed your arm and pulled you under his umbrella. It was all so sudden, that you ended up looking at him like in the movies, but your little one’s voice shook you from that short day-dream. “Hey, buddy, umbrellas are getting crazy these days.”

“Thanks, man,” Harley took the umbrella from your hands. “Hey, (Y/N), come on, we gotta go.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” you shook your head. “Thank you, again… uhhh… who are we thanking?” You chuckled lightly.

“It’s Sam. Sam Wilson,” he smiled softly. “And you two guys are?”

“(Y/N) De Clare, and this is Harley De Clare,” you placed a hand on Harley’s shoulder.

“Fancy names, we know,” he shrugged, “but we’re not fancy, we’re regular people,” Harley said in a mater-of-factly voice. You didn’t know where he got that from, because neither you nor your sister were like that, but it was funny because he sounded a lot older than a 7 year-old. “Who were you visiting, Sam?” Harley asked, fixing his eyes on the man you two had just met.

“Harls, we’ve talked about this before,” you said in a stern voice. “We don’t pry into people’s lives, when we’ve just met them,” you tapped his shoulder. “Come on, kiddo.”

“I was visiting a friend,” Sam calmly replied. “His name’s Riley, and we were best friends. But he left too soon, and if I may ask, who were you visiting, Harls?”

“My mom and dad,” Harley replied happily, and Sam frowned in confusion. He looked at you and then at Harley again. You shook your head in a careless manner.

“I’m his aunt. He’s my sister’s son,” you explained. “It’s a very long story.”

“Which you have never told me,” Harley rolled his golden eyes in exasperation. “You always say ‘when you’re older’ but I’m always getting older, and you never say anything.”

“Not now, Harls,” you rose your eyebrows. “It was very nice to meet you, Sam. Thank you again for the umbrella.”

“Let’s walk together,” he offered. “I’m sure Riley is sick of my constant blabbering. I’ve nothing new to tell him,” he laughed. 

“Alright, let’s go then—Harley, don’t go too far!” You called out to the kid who was already walking away with his umbrella. “God, this kid.”

“So, your sister’s kid?”

“Yeah, she died a few years ago…” you sighed heavily. “I’m Harley’s legal guardian and… mom, in a way. It’s the two of us against the world. What about you? Who’s Riley?”

“A friend. We were in the army together and he had an accident,” he said in a strange voice. As if it wasn’t supposed to be. “A stupid accident,” he shook it off. “Anyway, what happened to your sister? Why is that a secret?”

“My sister…killed herself,” you whispered. “Harley was like one or two years old and my sister was on her own…” you tugged at your bottom lip. “I don’t wanna tell Harley, not just yet.”

“Do you think he’s not ready?”

“I’m not ready,” you shook your head. “She left him a letter which I keep at work so he doesn’t find it. I’m gonna give it to him when he’s 10. That’s in three years, so I suppose I’ll be ready by then,” you shrugged. Harley was already at the entrance and waiting for you two. “It was nice meeting you, Sam.”

“Do you wanna exchange numbers?” He asked. “I know it’s weird, and we’ve only just met, and at a cemetery. I just… feel like doing it.”

“Alright,” you pursed your lips into a soft smile. It was weird indeed, but there you were, exchanging numbers with Sam Wilson, the umbrella savior. “Hope to hear from you soon.”

“Me too,” he smiled widely. “Nice to meet you, Harley.”

“Bye, Sam,” the little kid waved his hand and tugged at your hand to make you walk towards the station. “He seemed nice,” he said once you were far from the cemetery. “Are you gonna see him again?”

“I don’t know. Sometimes people exchange numbers and they never talk again,” you shrugged. “I am not expecting anything.”


	3. Third wheel

“Hey, book worm,” you leaned on Harley’s door frame and folded your arms over your chest. “It’s finally getting nice outside, wanna go out and grab something yummy? Perhaps we can go take a walk on Central Park afterwards… what’cha say?”

“Can I have some coffee?” Harley closed on the book and left it on his lap. He looked at you with old-man eyes, and you couldn’t help but giggle.

“Nope, nothing caffeinated for you,” you shook your head. “But we can get something from the Starbucks that’s two blocks from here if they have non caffeinated drinks, deal? Besides, you need to get some fresh air.”

“You had me at ‘it’s getting nice outside’,” Harley chuckled and jumped off the bed. You grabbed a jacket from his closet, and then you grabbed yours. You two headed for the Starbucks on 73rd street and then took the road towards the carrousel. It was your sister’s favorite spot and Harley’s too. It kinda made it your favorite spot too.

“Hey,” Harley turned to you with his drink in hand and a hipster look on his face, “don’t take any pictures,” little did he know that you had already taken one and posted it to your Instagram with some silly and cheesy caption. In a matter of seconds, you got a DM from no other than Sam Wilson.

“_That looks like Central Park. Care for some more company?_”

“_We’re at the carrousel. It’s getting kinda cold, so bring a jacket and an extra scarf because I’m getting cold, thanks in advance._”

“Hey, Harls!” You called him. “Guess who’s gonna keep us some company in a while?” He rose his eyebrows in inquiry. “Sam—he texted me that he’s coming. You don’t mind, right?”

“Are you two gonna have a date?”

“I thought you and I were on a date… Ok, this is awkward,” you dramatically placed a hand on your chest. “No, we are not having a date. In fact, Sam’s gonna crash ours.”

He chuckled lightly as he ran towards you. “Do you two talk like… often?” He asked in a sheepish voice, very unusual for those kinds of questions, but you nodded in acknowledgment and he pursed his thin lips. “Do you like him?”

“Why do you ask?” You coked an eyebrow. “What if I did?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged and looked away. “I don’t know him enough, maybe you do.”

“Harls, where is this going?” 

“I mean—I’ve never seen you going out with anyone,” he looked at you for a quick second. “I know most adults have… partners and stuff, the parents at school are… two. I mean, I don’t know if you have someone at work, which would be cool because you’d seen that person there since you’re at the office most of the week…”

“Do you want me to have someone?”

“Yeah,” Harley nodded. “I don’t want you to be alone…”

“I’m not alone,” you lovingly thumbed his cheek. “I have you, and right now, that’s all I need—and I all want,” you said before he could chime in. “Honey, don’t worry about that. I am the adult here, I am the grown up, and I should be worried about that, not you.”

“Are you worried about that?” He asked.

“No, I’ve got other things to think about,” you shook your head lightly. “If you must know, Sam and I are getting to know each other, we’re not even friends yet. He seems nice by now and that’s it. You have to promise me something, okay?” He nodded. “You’re not gonna worry about my personal life ever again—Harls, I mean it, you’re a kid, and you’re my kid, and I don’t want you worrying about stuff that doesn’t concern you. If I ever have a partner, you’ll be the first one to know and I’m gonna want your opinion on that,” he pointed at himself. “Yes, Harley. Your opinion is the most important one for me because you’re the most important person for me.”

“Am I?”

“Of course you are!” You smiled widely. “Now come on, give me a big hug,” you wrapped your arms around him and sighed heavily. You had a kid that was too good to be true, and too good to be yours.

Since he had a great personality, Harley went to play with some other kids in the park. You told him to stay close, and Sam arrived like 10 minutes later to the picnic tables outside the carrousel. He handed you the extra scarf he promised and sat next to you. Harley waved from afar and Sam waved back at him. 

“I brought you a little something,” he placed a box of carrot cupcakes on the table and you recognized them right away; they were from Magnolia Bakery, the place you and Harley often went to whenever you wanted to treat yo’ selves. “I thought you might like these.”

“I love these! Thank you so much!” You opened the box eagerly and grabbed one—needless to say, it was delicious as usual. “So, how’ve you been?”

“All work and no play,” he shrugged. “It’s tough, but someone’s gotta do it.”

“What do you for a living, Sam?” You narrowed your eyes.

“I am a soldier,” he said with a mysterious voice, “but I work at the Department of Veteran Affairs during the day,” he chuckled lightly. “I help people with PSTD, and they help me too. We all help each other.”

“Weren’t you retired?”

“There are many things you don’t know about me,” he chuckled again and shook his head. “My line of work is… complicated. I might need some alcohol to explain it, and you’ll need it too to begin to understand it.”

“That’s spooky,” you said in a flirty voice, not like you meant it, but it just came out like that. “But I don’t drink—sorry,” you shrugged. “I’m afraid I’m gonna have to be completely sober to enjoy and understand your story.”

“That’ll work too,” he smiled. “Do you mind if I pry into your life a little?” You shook your head. “I’ve been wondering what’s the whole deal with your family. You’re Harley’s aunt, and his parents are dead, so…?”

“My sister became pregnant when we were in college. She was in med school and I was in law school in Harvard. We were both brilliant and she had this boyfriend, Harley. They’d been together for a while, and they were actually engaged, and then Sandra, my sister, got pregnant and Harley was involved in a car crash—he died and my sister became depressed but not diagnosed. She quit school and went back to live with my mom,” you tugged at your bottom lip and looked around to see if Harley was anywhere near. “After Harls was born, my sister was diagnosed with post-partum depression and that was it for her. She didn’t last very long. She took her life about a year later, and Harley was left to my mom’s care.”

“And if you don’t mind me asking, how come you’re the one taking care of Harley?”

“My sister, in her will, left me in charge of all of her possessions until Harls becomes legal, and that includes him too. I am his tutor and stuff. I’ve been living with him since he was 2, so that’s about 5 years.”

“Why didn’t you live with him earlier? You said he was at your mom’s care even though you were the legal tutor.” 

“I…” you sighed heavily and shook your head. “I was a drug addict,” you tugged at your bottom lip and looked away. “I am not proud of it, but that’s how it is. Law school becomes slightly better when you put a lot of booze and drugs on it. I was brilliant, and I knew I was an addict, and I felt like I had it under control… until I passed out in the middle of a class,” you chuckled lightly. “It’s not funny, but now I’ve come to realize what a silly goose I was,” you pursed your lips. “I took a year off to go to rehab, but that didn’t last long. In that year I was in and out like 6 times, and then I found out that I was Harley’s tutor on the paper and it just hit me.”

“How so?”

“My sister wanted me to be his tutor because she knew he was the only one who could save me,” your eyes started to get teary. “I’m sorry, it’s a sad and crappy story—I’m sure you wanted something way less dramatic than this,” you shut your eyes closed to stop the tears from even getting out. “Harley means the world to me—god,” you groaned, “I’m so sorry, Sam—” you were about to stand up and call Harley, but Sam grabbed your hand and made you sit down again.

“You’re bitchin’ badass,” Sam said with an amused voice. “You lived through all that shit and here you are. I think you’re awesome—don’t be sorry for telling me this story, it’s part of you, and I want to get to know all of you.”


	4. First date

You opened the door, and though you knew who it was, you couldn’t help but to feel nervous. “Hey, Sam—I’ve got some bad news…” you sighed heavily. “My nanny called me a few minutes ago and she cannot make it. I’m afraid I can’t go to our date today, do you mind if we reschedule? I can’t leave him on his own.”

“But what if we go the three of us?” Sam asked walking into your apartment. “I didn’t make any reservations, and I was thinking of going to the cinema and then see where the evening could take us,” he shrugged.

“Let me ask—Harls!” You called, the boy appeared into the living room a few seconds after. “Hey, so… Sam and I were gonna go out, but I called Hannah and she can’t come today—do you wanna go out with us? I mean—you can’t stay here on your own, but do you wanna go out?”

“I have homework to do,” Harley shrugged.

“Harley,” you chuckled, “this gotta be the first time you put homework as an excuse.”

“Can we get McDonald’s though?” He looked at Sam, knowing you’d be more reluctant to say yes.

Sam looked at you, and since you were on the losing side, you gave in and nodded your head. “Yes, we can, buddy,” Sam clicked his tongue and pointed a finger gun at him. “I haven’t had McDonald’s in years,” he sighed, “what great way to come back to it.”

“Go get a coat, and tidy up your room real quick,” you looked at the boy and he ran back to his room. “I don’t let him eat a lot of McDonald’s—I don’t want him to get accustomed. It’s only for special occasions—Sam, can I ask you something?” He nodded. “You really don’t mind having Harley?” You twisted your lips. “We can reschedule.”

“Hey, no—” Sam walked towards you and placed a soft hand on your cheek and thumbed it lovingly—“I want to go out with you, and I know Harley is part of your life, so that makes me want to be with him too. When I told you I liked you I meant it—I like you, all of you. Bring a blanket, I know where we could go.”

“Do you always say stuff like this?” You tugged at your bottom lip, trying to hide a growing smile on your lips. “Harley, come on! Bring a blanket, please!” You yelled.

Sam’s idea of a date wasn’t exactly what you had planned. You should’ve guessed there was something off when he crossed the Hudson River through the Lincoln tunnel, and it got more and more strange as he asked Harley whether he had been to the Statue of Liberty. Harley’s negative answer only encouraged him more.

“It has its benefits to be in the VA’s office—I know somebody who knows somebody,” he shrugged as he parked outside. “Do you wanna see where you guys come from?”

Harley led way most of the time. Sam and you tried to talk, but you words were mostly “_Harley, don’t go too far, please!_”

The trip included spending some time at the Immigration Museum, where you could trace your people; though you couldn’t, since you weren’t too familiar with your own history. Harley did enjoy looking through other people’s history. He was most definitely a history nerd, but you wished that could reflect on his grades. Sam did promise you two to take you around the statue someday soon. You came back from the island and walked along the park towards the parking lot.

“Sam?” The boy looked at the older man. “Are we gonna get McDonald’s or what?” You chuckled lightly. “I’m hungry!” He pouted. 

“What if you guys wait outside in the park, and I go quickly to the one that’s nearest and we have a picnic?” 

“Yeah!” Harley cheerfully replied. “But don’t take too long.”

You and Harley placed the blanket on the grass and he rested his head on your lap. He was silent, way too silent. The breeze was soothing, and you were afraid he was falling asleep, so you shook him lightly and he looked at you with wide, wondering eyes.

“Is something wrong?” You asked softly. “You seem a bit off.”

“I was thinking about something—”

“Good lord, it’s gonna rain in here,” you laughed heartedly. “I’m sorry, sweetheart, tell me, what’s up?”

“I like Sam,” he said, looking at nothing. “He’s nice.”

“Yeah, he’s nice,” you replied, brushing away from his face some wild strands of hair. You liked him too, and what he said earlier still made your heart beat faster. After a long pause, in which you relived his words over and over again, you said. “What’s this all about?”

“I want you to be with him,” he said simply. “I like him and I like him for you. He treats you well, he takes you on cool dates even if I’m included… He seems like a good person.”

“Harley—baby…”

“I really don’t want you to be alone, (Y/N),” Harley sighed. “Besides, Sam seems to like you a lot. He looks at you with weird eyes, like the one people have in movies when they look at someone they like,” he shrugged. “It would be nice to have him around more often.”

“Silly goose,” you chuckled. “Have you considered if I like him? Because I may not like him.”

“But you’re on a date with him,” he pointed out. “I can tell you’re different—you seem… happier around him. I like that, you being happy…. It makes me happy too.”

“Harley, I am happy. Look, Sam and I are friends, we’re still getting to know each other and that’s pretty much it. I don’t know if I like him, but if do, you’ll be the first one to know.”

“Really? Not even grandma?”

“Baby, you know we don’t talk very often—she wouldn’t even care if I was dating anyone. You, on the other hand, live with me, and if I were to date anyone, I would like to bring that person home on a daily basis, maybe having dinner the three of us, and going out, going to Coney Island together? I don’t know,” you shrugged. “But if I want to do that with a person, I’d like to have your opinion about it, because you mean the world to me, and if you don’t like someone, then I don’t like that person either… I feel like we already had this conversation before.”

“Am I that important?”

“Of course, you silly goose,” you ruffled his hair and he lifted his upper body to hug you tightly.

You two stayed together in comfortable silence until Sam arrived not long after with that blessed McDonald’s. As you munched on those delicious fries, you couldn’t help but think about how well Sam and Harley got on. Sam was making his way into your heart, there was no doubt about that, but the voice inside your head that always sabotaged you was telling you he would someday to something to hurt you and him.

And that you couldn’t take.

You could get hurt a hundred times, but Harley was a whole different thing. 

Sam drove you two home, and Harley fell asleep not long after. You were silent, staring at the window at the walls of Lincoln Tunnel, but you were startled by a hand on your thigh. It was a swift touch, but it served the purpose of taking you out of your thoughts.

“You okay?” Sam asked, peering quickly at your side. “You seem off.”

“I’m just a bit tired,” you shook your head. “It’s been a long day—fun, but a bit long.”

“Did you really have fun?”

“Yeah,” you smiled at him. “I actually haven’t had this much fun in quite a long time. I hope we get to do this again, just two of us though,” you tugged at your bottom lip and thanked the tunnel was dark enough to hide the fact you were blushing like a teenager.

“It’s gonna be hard to top this one, I’m afraid.”

“You can try,” you giggled. “I bet you’re one resourceful man.”


	5. Harley's birthday

“_Happy birthday to you…!_” You, Sam, and some of Harley’s classmates sang to him. You kissed the top of his head as the kids cheered on him.

When it got late enough, parents started picking up their kids’ stuff and saying their goodbyes to you, Harley, and even Sam. The house was slowly emptying and your nephew seemed a little tired. He was checking his new stuff and Sam was helping you with the dishes and the trash.

“Thanks, Sammy,” you sighed tiredly. “Though you shouldn’t be doing this.”

“I figured you might need a little help,” he shrugged casually. “Besides, this is way too much for you to handle,” Sam hung the kitchen cloth on his shoulder and opened his arms to give you a hug. “Come here,” you weren’t really sure why, but you went there so willingly that the moment he wrapped his arms around you, something felt warm inside you. Like the feeling of putting two matching puzzle pieces together. You were a perfect fit for his embrace.

Out of a sudden, the doorbell rang, and before you could tell Harley to not go to the door, he was already opening it to a rather unpleasant guest.

“Harley, sweetheart,” a female voice called your attention, and as you left Sam’s hug, your jaw dropped. “Happy birthday,” the woman made her way inside and left an enormous present on the table. “How are you?”

“Hey, mom,” you breathed.

“Oh, I didn’t see you there,” she replied shortly. “I was wondering why Harley opened the door on his own. Shouldn’t open to strangers, don’t you think?” Your mom used a passive-aggressive tone with you and you didn’t like it. Besides, Sam was there and witnessing the whole scene. You looked at him, almost apologetically. “Anyway, how have you been, darling? Turning 8 is a big deal, right? I remember when your mother turned 8, we threw a party for her.”

“Was aunt (Y/N) there too?” Harley looked at you.

“Yes, honey,” you chimed in. “Have I ever told you that your mom and I were twins?” You, of course, were not really there. Yes, you two were twins, but the party wasn’t really for you. You do remember to have spent that day with your dad. “She was the oldest, for like two minutes, and she never let me forget it,” you giggled. “Mom, you could’ve called, I would’ve saved you a piece of cake. By the way, Sam, this is Felicia De Clare, my mom.”

“Nice to meet—”

“Are you two together?” Felicia asked coldly.

“Oh, no ma’am,” Sam shook his head. “We’re just friends.”

“Good,” she shot back. “I wouldn’t want my daughter to lose her focus again.”

Harley walked to the table to unwrap the big box that his grandma brought for him. His face lit up at the sight of a new computer and an iPhone. Felicia signaled you to have a word, and you told Sam to stay with Harley.

“Harls, don’t get too excited with the phone,” you kindly reminded him. “You know you can’t keep it.”

“Why not?” You mom interjected.

“Harley is not allowed to have a phone until he’s 10. The damages are way more than the benefits,” you said simply as you walked her to the kitchen. “Alright,” you sighed when you were far from Harley’s ears, “what is it.”

“I’m gonna make this quick, I’m taking you to court,” Felicia took a folder full of documents from her ridiculously big handbag and handed it to you. “I don’t trust you to be fit enough to be taking care of him. I know I should’ve done this earlier, but it’s still not too late to let you influence him.”

“Excuse me, I am Harley’s legal guardian,” you said in evident offense. “You cannot take that right away from me.”

“You came out of rehab just a few years ago, who knows if you’re hiding something in this house?” Felicia taunted. “I will not take any chance.”

“I’ve been clean for five years, mom,” you said firmly. “How many years have you been clean? Don’t think I’ve forgotten about my childhood. Do you remember my 8th birthday? You didn’t even throw that party for me, and Sandy and I were the same fucking age. You sent me with my dad,” the tears started to pool in your eyes. “You didn’t want to spend any of my birthdays with me. There’s nothing that’s gonna make me forget how neglecting you were.”

“I am only doing what is best for Harley,” your mom, as usual, didn’t show any sign of emotion other than pride. “I’m gonna go—”

“What were you two talking about?” Harley ran into the kitchen, and his curiosity peaked when he saw you at the verge of tears. “Why are you two so serious?”

“Hey, kiddo,” Sam appeared right behind him. “Why don’t we go back? The adults are having a serious conversation that’s none of our business,” he tugged at the child’s arm but the younger one didn’t seem to want to give up. 

“(Y/N), what were you talking about?” Harley was serious now, and he looked way older than he was. “I want to know.”

“I want you to live with me, darling,” your mom changed her face to a softer one. “I’ve wanted it for a very long time, but now (Y/N) and I are going to see a person who’s gonna decide that you live with me from now on.”

“Are we going to live together? (Y/N), you and me? Can Sam visit us too?”

“No, just you and me,” Felicia shook her head. “We’re gonna have fun,” she faked a kind voice that sent shivers down your spine. “But I think you’re gonna have to change school, because I don’t live too near from your current one.”

“Mom, stop it,” you threatened and placed your hands on Harley’s shoulders. 

“But I want to live with aunt (Y/N),” Harley was becoming anxious, and he held on to your hands tightly. “Why don’t you go and live with us?” He looked up at you with watery eyes. “Why do I have to change school? I like where I am, my classmates are fun. I like Miss Daniels too!”

“You’re not going anywhere, babe,” you placed a soft kiss on his forehead. “Grandma’s just joking, and it’s a very bad one, right?” You smiled. “Don’t worry, you’re gonna stay with me. Mom, I’m gonna have to ask you to leave now. Harley, walk her to the door, would you? And return her the phone, you know we have a deal.”

“Have it your way, but don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Felicia huffed and, with Harley by her side, made her way towards the front door. You heard how the door closed and something inside you cracked. 

“Are you alright?” Sam softly asked, placing a hand on the small of your back and feeling how shaky and nervous you were. You nodded a silent response, unsure of your own voice. “Hey, Harls, why don’t you go and look for the other thing you wanted to show me?” He encouraged the little boy who was coming back, and he went out the kitchen, running to his bedroom. “(Y/N), hey…” Sam sighed, making you turn around and holding you in his arms. “It’s ok, it’s ok…” He caressed your back as you let out small tears.

“She’s gonna take him away from me,” you sobbed. “What am I gonna do now?”

“You can win this—no, you will win this” he placed his hands on both sides of your face and made you look up at him. “You work with great lawyers, one of them is gonna help you. She’s not gonna take him away from you… I don’t know if I can do something to help, but I’m sure you’re gonna win and you’re gonna keep him.”

“What if I can’t?” You cried on his chest. “Sam, she’s gonna find everything she has on me, even the things I thought buried… She’s gonna win and she’s gonna take Harley away from me and I’m gonna—”

“No, you’re not going back there.” Sam cupped your face in his hands and looked straight at you. “I know there’s very little I can do, but you have me, and I won’t let you alone. You’re with me now.”

You looked up, your chest heaving against Sam’s, who was also looking at you. He didn’t even hesitate, but although he was unsure of your possible reaction, he leaned forward to find your lips with his. You was still shocked, but out of instinct, you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders and went along with it. You wasn’t very sure if you needed it, let alone if you wanted it, but your day couldn’t end up this terrible.

“Ugh!” Harley exclaimed as he got into the kitchen again. “Not here!” Sam giggled, as he still had you well secured in his arms. “(Y/N), you were crying, what happened?”

“Nothing—nothing,” you huffed and dried the tears with the back of your hand. “I got a bit emotional because you’re growing up way too fast and I cannot stop time. Your mommy would be very proud of you,” you kneeled and pulled Harley for a tight hug, fearing it would be the last one.


	6. The help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On Monday, when you had to go to the office, your first stop was at Jeri Hogarth’s office. She was ruthless when she wanted, and you were very sure she didn’t like children at all and that she didn’t work with these cases. But above all, she was your best shot at winning the case. You knew your mom would hit you where it hurt the most, so you needed to fight back.

On Monday, when you had to go to the office, your first stop was at Jeri Hogarth’s office. She was ruthless when she wanted, and you were very sure she didn’t like children at all and that she didn’t work with these cases. But above all, she was your best shot at winning the case. You knew your mom would hit you where it hurt the most, so you needed to fight back.

You took a deep breath right before the doors to her office, and fearing the worst, you walked in. She was there, facing the glass wall that gave her a privileged view of New York City. Your steps didn’t seem to alert her of your presence at all.

“Miss Hogarth,” you said nervously. Jeri Hogarth took a while to turn around, and when she did her question was silent, but represented by a dark, cocked eyebrow. “I—I need your help,” the short haired lawyer nodded quickly. “My mother is trying to take my nephew away from me. She’s taking me to court and I need help.”

“You could do it yourself, (Y/N). As a licensed attorney you have every right to participate in your own defense, but you know that already, right? You’re a fine lawyer, and if not, you could find another lawyer who works with these cases very easily.” Hogarth leaned on her chair. “Why asking me?”

“I’m desperate,” you spat. “That child is all I have, and you’re my best shot at winning—no offense to your associates, but they are not as good as you are,” kissing her ass always worked a little, and the soft smile that formed on her lips relaxed you a little.

“But he’s not your own child; he was your late sister’s child as I am aware,” Hogarth intertwined her hands over the desk; her face as emotionless as usual. “Why fighting for him like this? Why not letting your mother take care of him? That way you could focus more on your career, and who knows? Maybe we could add your last name to the firm.”

“Because I’m the closest thing he has to a mother,” you retorted. “I may have had a terrible past, god knows that,” you narrowed her eyes, “and in court, that’s gonna be more points for my mom, but I know for sure she’s not the best for him. She’s not clean and I can prove it,” you said firmly. “She has no idea about motherhood, and neither do I, but in 5 years I’ve learnt more than her in more than 20.”

“You know I don’t work with these cases, anyway,” Hogarth pushed the chair to the back and looked for her briefcase that was next to her desk.

“You can take a part from my salary,” you hurried to say, as if it would somehow convince her to work for you. “I have saved a lot of money working for you these years—please. Miss Hogarth, I need the help.”

“Well, I don’t need your money,” the lawyer stood up from her chair, holding the briefcase in her hand and walking towards the glass doors, right past by you. She stopped and turned in her heels before exiting the room. “But what I am going to need is everything you have on your mother. And I’m gonna have to meet your nephew too if we are going to make this thing work.”


	7. First day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you need him?”
> 
> “Yes, your honor.”
> 
> “Thank you for your honesty, (Y/N),” she smiled lightly and nodded.

You walk to the stand, helped by the officer and he makes you swear to tell the truth, the hole truth and nothing but the truth. It was a whole another experience being there on that side. Your mom was right in front of you, looking at you with a smug expression on her face, and when you peered over at Sam, he gently smiled at you. It wasn’t exactly calming, but with that simple thing, he made you feel like you were not alone.

Your mom’s lawyer walked towards you, and with almost the same expression as your mom, he began.

“So, (Y/N)… you’re my client’s daughter, right?”

“As far as I know, yes,” you calmly replied. “It’s what the birth certificate says…”

“Why do you think you’re the most adequate person to take care of the child in question? If I may say, you’re too young to complete such task… don’t you think it would be best to have someone more experienced?”

“Definitely,” you agreed. “But my sister made it very clear she wanted me to take care of Harley. She might have passed, but I love her and I respect her wishes. I cannot say I’m the best, but the child in question has his needs well covered thanks to the efforts I’m doing.”

“Do you think so?” You nodded. “Does the child know about this?” As he spoke, a well-known paper was projected and your blood ran cold. It was your first admission on rehab, the worst one. You didn’t really remember how you got there, you just remember waking up, tied up and screaming. 

“He does not,” you admitted. “I don’t see a reason why he should know I was admitted to rehab a few times in the past. Besides, he’s 8. Doesn’t seem like a wise decision, sir.”

“Few times?” He asked as he made a dozen of your admission papers appear on the projector. “Does this quantity of admission forms seem like a few times to you?”

“It does not,” you sighed heavily. “Yet, the last one of those papers is from around 7 years ago, when the child was 1 year old, under his mother’s and his grandmother’s care. My sister saw me walking out of my last rehab, but didn’t live long enough to see me live like this.”

“Like this?” The next slide was a picture of you and Sam holding hands. “Or like this?” The following one, pictured you and Sam kissing. “Can you tell me who this man is?”

“Objection,” Hogarth called. “Why is this even relevant?” You looked at Sam with frightened eyes and he nodded at you as if he was saying to relax. You didn’t want him there, but he was with you just for moral support and you couldn’t refuse that. You sighed heavily and shook your head.

“Overruled, carry on,” the judge looked at your mom’s lawyer. “Answer the question, Miss De Clare.”

“This is… Samuel Thomas Wilson… we are friends.”

“Very close friends, apparently, since you also brought him here. Does he know the child?” You nodded. “How did you two meet?”

“Objection, this is not relevant,” Jeri called again. She shook her head at you, as if she told you to not answer the question.

“I don’t think this is relevant either, but do you want to answer?” The judge looked at you and you nodded again. 

“We all met at Saint John’s Cemetery, in Middle Village about… six or seven months ago. Harley and I had gone there after school to see his parents. It was raining and Harley lost his umbrella. Sam found it, he gave it to us and that’s pretty much it. Harley and I were just leaving, and so was Sam, so we talked a bit on our way out and we exchanged numbers because I thought he seemed really nice. Like I said, this was about six or seven months ago, so it’s not new, and that picture must have been taken about a month ago,” for the first time, you saw your mom’s lawyer speechless. “I don’t usually go out with many people, or men, if that’s where you wanna go. I have a busy schedule and a busier personal life. He is currently my partner, romantic partner. Harley is well informed of this and he was the first to be consulted by Sam and by me.”

“Does Sam know about the papers we saw?”

“Yes, he does.”

“So apparently knows except for the child in question. Why?”

“As I said, I think he’s too young to know,” you said firmly. “He will know, in two more years, but, right now, he’s not ready for it.”

“What makes you think he’s going to be ready then and not now?”

“I don’t know if you’ve worked with cases with minors,” you said trying to conceal a shit eating grin, “but being prudent is of utmost importance. Children process things differently because their brain has not developed yet. Harley is 8, he’s barely going into puberty. When he’s 10, his brain will be more developed to understand certain topics, such as death. It’s not like children are exposed to it thanks to the media or their experiences in general, but it is more sensible to do it when they are older, and they are able to… process it in a better way.  
”  
“No more questions, your honor,” the attorney said and walked back to his seat.

“May I talk to you, your honor?” You looked at the judge and she nodded silently. “I know I’ve messed up in the past, you saw the records; you all did. My papers are not clean, I know that—but I’ve tried very hard to become a better person, which I am. Harley is never gonna have with my mom the love, support and stability he has with me. I know I didn’t have any of those things while growing up. I have a stable job which pays for his education, the roof over his head, the blankets in his bed and the food in his plate. I am clean, I have been completely clean for almost 6 years, and it’s tough sometimes, it’s very tough. But that child needs me.”

“Do you need him?”

“Yes, your honor.”

“Thank you for your honesty, (Y/N),” she smiled lightly and nodded. “We’ll meet again tomorrow.”


	8. The break-up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I need a word,” you said the second he closed the door and looked at you. “Not here, let’s go to the parking lot,” Sam sighed and nodded silently. “Harley!” You heard a “_what_” from afar. “Sam and I need to go the car to get something form there, we’ll be back soon. Stay here, alright? It won’t take long!” You yelled to him and he made some sound of acknowledgement you couldn’t quite get. “Come on,” you told Sam as you grabbed your keys.

You were sitting on the living room with your legs crossed and a terrible feeling on your stomach. You were ready to blow up like a bomb, and your victim was turning the keys on the lock. 

“I need a word,” you said the second he closed the door and looked at you. “Not here, let’s go to the parking lot,” Sam sighed and nodded silently. “Harley!” You heard a “what” from afar. “Sam and I need to go the car to get something form there, we’ll be back soon. Stay here, alright? It won’t take long!” You yelled to him and he made some sound of acknowledgement you couldn’t quite get. “Come on,” you told Sam as you grabbed your keys. 

The way to the parking was silent and awkward. You secretly knew that Sam knew what you wanted to talk about. Of course he knew, he was not stupid—although kind of, because he didn’t tell you earlier. He knew he should’ve done it, but he was scared it wouldn’t turn out alright.

“(Y/N), I need to tell you something,” Sam was very serious, more serious than you had ever seen him. But in all his seriousness, there was a slight taint of fear and despair in his voice.

“Is this what you wanted to talk about?” You took out a paper with piece of news of him and Captain America portrayed in a big picture and held it right in front of him. They were in tight war-looking suits with a fierce expression. “So, an Avenger?”

“Yes—I wanted to tell you sooner—”

“Are you kidding me?” You felt the anger bursting out of your pores. “This is not something you tell me after months of actual relationship. Sam, this is something you tell me before we even jump into this,” you covered your face with your hands and took a deep breath. “When were you planning on telling me?”

“I was scared…”

“Scared of what?”

“Of you getting hurt,” he admitted.

“Oh Jesus, that’s just perfect. Well, didn’t you think that someone could find out first that I was with you and could’ve done something to me?” Sam was speechless. “Clearly not—god, Sam. What were you thinking?”

“I’m sorry,” he sighed. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“Well I didn’t know how to tell you I was a fucking drug addict, yet here we are, I did tell you beforehand. Because I didn’t want you to be with me without knowing all about me. Do you think I’m proud of my past? Of course not!” You yelled. “But my thing is not something you just hide under the rug. You know that it’s been largely discussed in the trial. Sam—I don’t know how my mom’s lawyer didn’t get that information… If he had…” you ran your fingers through your hair and tugged at it. “Sam, if that lawyer had known you’re an Avenger, the judge would’ve taken Harley away from me, because I’m putting him in a tremendous amount of danger,” you said softly. “Don’t you get it?”

“I do, and that’s why I wanted to tell you earlier but I chickened out!”

“Sam, my whole life has been a series of being with unstable people. I was unstable myself, and you know what I thought the day I realized I was actually falling for you?” Sam gulped and shook his head. “I thought I was finally finding some stability in my damned life. But turns out that I am not.”

“(Y/N), please listen to me,” he sighed. “I didn’t tell you because I thought it would scare you away. It scares a lot of people, and that why we don’t have many friends outside work. The day we bumped into each other at Central Park and you told me about your life, about your sister and all that, I wanted to tell you, but then I didn’t, and I waited until our first date, but then we had Harley—”

“No, don’t you dare blame him,” you growled. “We’ve had many dates after that, and you’ve had many opportunities to tell me.”

“I know, and I blew them all!” He rubbed his hands against his face. “Look, I don’t know what can I do to make this better, but if you wanna know more about it just ask and I’ll tell you. I’ll tell you everything you want to know.”

“Sam… I don’t want to know anything,” you said in a soft voice. “I really don’t have the energy to care about that… I need to stay focused on the trial, on keeping Harley’s custody—I… I’m sorry, but I can’t deal with this.”

“What’s this supposed to mean?”

“I think we need to break up—” your lips moved, but no word came out—“I… I just can’t deal with this, Sam.”

“Are you serious?” You nodded silently. “No, I don’t want to break up with you, I want us to talk it out and work this up like grown-ups.”

“Sam,” you chuckled, but there wasn’t even a slight sign of happiness; if anything, it was a sad, empty sound, “you were the one who hid that from me, that wasn’t very grown-up from you. I don’t really care about what you do from now on. Go and avenge the shit out of you,” you made a swift and careless move with your hand. “I don’t care—I can’t care about that right now…”

“You’re not serious…”

“Probably, because I actually love you, and I didn’t want this to be the situation of me telling you that,” your voice seemed soft and far, but you couldn’t really hear yourself. Your senses had somehow disconnected from you. “I’m just sad I let you into my life, into Harley’s life. He doesn’t deserve this—I’m gonna tell him we broke up and that’s it. He doesn’t need to know more about you.”

“Don’t do this,” Sam pleaded.

“I just need some stability right now,” you shook your head and walked away. “Bye, Sam,” your hands were cold and your whole body felt weird. You walked towards the elevator and Sam was the last thing you saw there. 

Later that night, Harley slid under the covers of your bed and stayed in silence for a while. It had to be something very important for him to get in bed with you. Sometimes it was because of a nightmare, or because he wanted to cuddle, but that day you weren’t sure why.

“What happened, baby?” You asked in a whisper.

“Did you and Sam broke up?”

“Mmm…” you hummed. “Yes, we did.”

“Why?”

“Because he kept a big secret from me, and I found out about it.”

“Was it that bad? Was he cheating on you?” He wrapped his arms around you and you placed his head under your arm to wrap your other arm around his torso.

“It was bad, but it wasn’t that—I can’t tell you, or at least… It should’ve been him who told you,” you sighed. “It was not my secret to tell, baby… It still isn’t.”

“But you like him?”

“Yes.”

“Then why letting him go?” It hit you that he wasn’t able to understand the complexities of the adult life, and for an instant, you wished you didn’t either. You wanted to be with Sam, that was for sure, but adulthood was so complicated at times that you realized that you didn’t know how to be with a man whose job included probable death as part of the contract.

“Because it is hard to be with someone who keeps secrets from you.”

“But you keep secrets from me too, and I’m still here,” though still a child, Harley was very smart, and you pondered if it was because you raised him like a tiny adult or if because he had his parents’ intelligence. You hoped it was the latter one, because if it was because of you, it meant that he must’ve gotten some of your bad habits as well.

“What secrets?” You asked in a high-pitched voice, almost like a squeal. 

“What really happened to my mom, and the things you did before we lived together. You always say that you’ll tell me when I’m older, but I’m not getting any younger, you know?” You chuckled lightly in amusement at the strange things your kid could say sometimes.

“I told you that I would tell you when you’re 10,” you complained. “That’s a promise, and you know I keep my promises. I can’t tell you now because I think you’re too young for it, but I will tell you in two years more, I actually have it all planned out.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I’m gonna take you to dinner on the day after your birthday, since it’s gonna be a Saturday, we’ll both be free and we’ll have a lot of time to talk. I want to make a reservation at a cool place in which we can be on our own. That day, I’ll tell you everything, and answer your questions if you have any. Besides, what I am keeping from you is not even dangerous. It can hurt, yes,” you tilted your head to both sides, “but it won’t do no harm.”

“Sam is not going to tell me, so you can tell me now…”

“Alright,” you shook your head. You two were still in the dark of your bedroom, so making faces for thinking was slightly easier now. “So, do you know Captain America, right? Iron Man, Thor… you know those guys, right?”

“Yeah, you told me they fought the aliens!”

“Yeah, and they did a lot of other things too, like what happened in D.C.,” you continued. “Well, did you know Sam used to live in Washington?” Harley hummed a negative answer. “Yeah, Sam lived there when that happened. He, umm, he knows Captain America because they’re really good friends,” you tugged at your bottom lip. “Sam is part of the team.”

“Is he an Avenger?”

“Yup,” you nodded, “and that’s why we broke up.”

“So you’re saying that you broke up with Sam because he fights bad guys?”

“It’s not just that,” you said. “Have you seen the videos of how the Avengers fight? Well, there are explosions, injured people, and sometimes, dead people… And that can be Sam one day, and I don’t want that. I don’t want to be near another person dying. You know, when your mommy died, I became really sad because she was my best friend in the world, and I felt like I lost a big piece of my heart… and I do love Sam, but him, dying… I just can’t do that.”

“I understand,” Harley said softly, tightening the embrace around your torso. “I don’t think I would like Sam dying, or fearing he would die…” he sighed. “But you cannot worry about him all the time, he knows what he’s doing, otherwise he wouldn’t be doing it, right?” He yawned loudly as he rolled off on his side. “You wouldn’t be working at the office if you weren’t awesome at what you do,” he said groggily. “I’m gonna sleep with you so you don’t feel lonely, okay?”

“Yeah, baby—okay,” you nodded and placed a soft kiss on the back of his head. “Sleep tight.”

Harley was way too smart to be 8 years old.


	9. Last day of trial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Custody cases are far more common than one may think,” with those words, the judge took you out of your head. “It’s always a parent against someone else, sometimes another parent, but this case is odd, since it is a grandmother against a legal guardian."

“Do I really have to go?” Harley asked as you helped him with the tie. “You can go for the both of us,” he looked for your eyes, but you were way too focused on not losing your shit to pay attention.

“Harley,” you sighed heavily and shook your head lightly, “you must go too because this case involves you. If it were something between grandma and I would’ve called Hannah to stay with you while I’m gone, but since you are the motivation for us to be there, it is you who we need the most,” you, on one knee, looked up to him after gathering some strength.

“Okay,” he agreed, though not very convinced. “Is Sam going to be there, then?” He asked after a pause.

“I don’t know, babe,” you shook your head again. “You know we broke up, and when people break up in bad terms, they tend to not speak for a very long time… sometimes forever. Besides he’s not a part of the thing, he was called as a witness and he did what he had to do.”

“How are you feeling about that? Are you still sad?” His bottom lip came out in a cute pout.

“A little,” you admitted. “I kind of miss him, but what makes me very, very sad is that you’re not gonna be able to see him because of me,” you lowered your eyes, because they were starting to get all teary. “I’m really sorry for what happened… I didn’t mean to let him into our lives and make him be gone just like that but…”

“Don’t worry,” he thumbed your cheek the same way you had done for him a hundred times. It seemed silly, that young boy taking care of you and holding your broken heart together. “You look pretty, by the way,” he smiled. “Is this how you dress for court and stuff?”

“Yeah,” you smiled lightly, “though I wish I could go with sneakers… but that’s not very formal, isn’t it?” You got back up and back together. “Hurry, George is waiting for us downstairs.”

The way to the courthouse was silent, and it seemed as if Harley was giving you some space to feel your emotions. You were scared, though Hogarth was confident that you’d get Harley’s custody reassured, you didn’t have that much confidence. 

“Are you scared?” Harley took you out of your thoughts with a soft voice.

“A little bit,” you confessed. “But Miss Hogarth says we’ll do just fine,” you grabbed his hand and held it. “I trust her, do you trust her?” Harley nodded silently. “Then we’ll be alright.”

You hated to admit it, but you wanted to let out all your fears with someone, and that someone was Sam. You were taken back to a day when things were easier, simpler, and you just enjoyed Harley’s company. With the trial, you often thought about the first days of living with him on your own. You had no idea of how difficult it could be, but you made it through.

“Custody cases are far more common than one may think,” with those words, the judge took you out of your head. “It’s always a parent against someone else, sometimes another parent, but this case is odd, since it is a grandmother against a legal guardian. The main problem in this particular case is that neither parts are clean, so to speak. They both owe the child massive amounts of honesty, as a contribution to the love both parts seem to give the child in question. Love and care, without honesty, is simply a lie, and if either of you is to raise this young man, it is of utmost importance that, whoever I decide to give custody to, has an honest and open hearted conversation, and (Y/N),” the woman looked straight at you, “don’t take too long. The petition to appoint guardianship is denied, full custody shall reside with (Y/N) De Clare,” and audible sigh of relief escaped from your lips, and you heard Harley calling your name. You turned around and grabbed his tiny hand in yours. “Mrs. De Clare, I fear your disdain for your daughter might affect the child’s well-being. You are not allowed to see him without the presence of his legal guardian. Visitations will be set according to the child and his legal guardian’s schedule with a mediator. We are adjourned.” 

You, Harley and Hogarth came out of the courtroom in a haze.

You found Sam waiting outside the room, and when you all came out, you heard his voice calling you. Harley turned his head and went straight to say hi with a big and tight hug. You told Harley to go with the lawyer and wait for you.

“Hey,” you said.

“Hey,” he replied. “So, what happened? I saw you coming out with Harley,” he asked after an awkward silence. “I suppose…”

“I’m keeping full custody of Harley,” you smiled lightly, “and mom doesn’t get to be around him unless I am in the room. She’s gonna get visitations, but she’ll have to adapt to our schedule,” you shrugged. “What have you been up to? What are you doing here?”

“Harley told me a few days ago… I thought you might’ve needed someone in case it all went south, but I was hoping it didn’t… I just wanted to say hi and tell you I’m happy for how things turned out.”

“I hope you’re not happy for how things turned out between us, because if so I would be kinda mad,” you chuckled breathily. “Look,” you sighed heavily, “I really didn’t want us to break up, Sam, but there were too many things that I couldn’t handle at that time. I mean, one minute you’re my regular boyfriend Sam, and the next thing I know is that you’re an Avenger because I read that on the news? I just did what was best for my mental health,” you shook your head, “and at that moment, breaking up seemed like the best idea.”

“I know,” he nodded guiltily. “I know I should’ve told you all of it earlier but I couldn’t—I thought I was keeping you safe by not telling you that, but turns out that I was the one who hurt you, and I cannot forgive myself.”

“It’s okay,” you pursed your lips. “You didn’t meant to hurt me… and I’m a big girl,” you shrugged one shoulder, “I can take care of myself.”

“I know that… but I meant it when I said I wanted to be with you through it all…” he looked at you with kind eyes. “(Y/N), I love you, I really do, and these last couple of months without you have been really terrible. I miss you a lot, and I need you.”

“Sam…” you breathed. “I can’t do this right now,” you tugged at your bottom lip and shook your head. “If you wanna talk about this, it’s okay, call me and we’ll discuss it over coffee or something, but right now I can’t deal with this. I’m sorry—Harley’s waiting for me,” you turned around and walked away as fast as you could.


	10. The after trial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam texted you right after you met at the courthouse with an invitation to have something to eat at the same place you two went on your first date alone. The place brought the best memories, and you hoped that night could end just the same as it did the first time.

Sam texted you right after you met at the courthouse with an invitation to have something to eat at the same place you two went on your first date alone. The place brought the best memories, and you hoped that night could end just the same as it did the first time.

“You said Harley told you… how?”

“I got a call from his school. Apparently I’m still an emergency number—”

“God, I’m sorry,” you shook your head. “I didn’t update that list.”

“Don’t worry, I don’t mind being on that list. Besides, I know you can’t leave work sometimes, and my schedule is a bit more relaxed than yours—well, as I was telling you,” he continued, “I got a call from school that Harley needed to talk to me, he was there at that office and he told me that the trial was coming to an end, and that he wanted me to be there… with you.”

“That kid…” you shook your head. “How have you been?”

“Can’t say I’m alright,” he said in a simple way. “I already told you, I’ve missed you like hell—(Y/N) before you say anything. I know I fucked up—I know that, and I know there’s nothing I can do to win your trust, but I don’t want to be without you.”

“Sam, it’s not about that,” you shook your head again. “I never stopped trusting you. I understand why you didn’t tell me, it’s pretty much like why I haven’t told Harley the truth about my life and my sister, but this is different. Sam, your line of work can get you killed, and…” you sighed heavily, tugging at your bottom lip. “I don’t want to deal with any more deaths in my life—I’ve had my fair share in just a few years, and yours…” you clicked your tongue. “I don’t know if I could handle yours. Not right now. I know I cannot make you change your job because what you do is important, and besides, you must enjoy it, otherwise you wouldn’t be doing it,” Sam looked down at his hands guiltily. “But I cannot not worry about you—”

“Meet me halfway, (Y/N),” Sam said in despair. “I love you—I adore you, and I don’t wanna be without you anymore.”

“What do you want me to do?” You cocked an eyebrow.

“I don’t know,” he sighed heavily. “I cannot ask you not to worry, because I know you will, and… I cannot stop doing something that’s just part of who I am.”

“Should we call it quits, then?” You pursed your lips. Sam stayed in silence for a while. “Sam, I love you too, you know that, but I’m not sure we want the same things…” you shook your head lightly. “I’m sorry, I think I’m gonna go…” you grabbed your bag from your side and stood up. “I thought tonight would end up differently…”

You headed to the bar and asked to pay for everything.

Once you got home, you told Hannah to leave, and since it was kind of late, you went straight to bed. Harley’s bedtime had been a few hours ago, so he wouldn’t bother you with questions until the next morning… or so you thought.

He climbed in your bed about 10 minutes after you turned off your light, and the questionnaire begun almost immediately.

“How was it?”

“Baby, I’m a bit tired, can we just sleep?” You sighed heavily and shook your head. “Besides, it’s not something you should know. It’s an adult’s thing, and I told you I don’t like when you worry about these things.”

“But I care about Sam, not as much as I care about you, but I really wanna know what happened, are you two getting back together?”

“No, we’re not—”

Out of a sudden, you are startled by the sound of the doorbell. It must have been like 1 am, so you were definitely not expecting anyone. You told Harley to hide in the bathroom and to keep your phone close in case something happened. On your way to the front door, you grabbed a knife from the kitchen and slowly walked to see who was outside.

You must’ve groaned very loudly, because from the other side of the door, Sam was telling you to open the door.

“What in the world are you doing here?”

“I’m sorry—I swear I’m not drunk,” he shook his head, but his voice was agitated and it kinda scared you. He seemed restless, hyped, like a stone. “I just… I just couldn’t let this end like this. Can I come in?”

“Are you on something?” You asked, tightly holding the knife behind your back.

“What? No!” He replied quickly. “I’m just… Please, let me in,” he breathed. You stepped aside from the door and walked back to the kitchen to return the knife to its place. Sam turned on the lights and saw you near the cutlery drawer. “Did you have a knife with you?” You nodded. “Atta girl,” he smiled lightly. “Look, I’ve been thinking about this since you left the restaurant today, and I wanted to tell you,” he took a deep breath and continued. “I know I’m asking for a lot, but hear me out. I can’t leave my job, I’m sorry, but I’m really good at it, and I’ve got an amazing team that has my back—they wouldn’t let anything happen to me—or you.”

“Sam—”

“Listen, I know that nothing I say is gonna make you trust that I’ll take care, but you were wrong when you said I didn’t want the same as you. Remember how you told me how you wanted a real family? I want that too, all of it, your kid and my dangerous job included. I wouldn’t have it any other way… I’m scared, but take this leap of faith with me, please.”

“Sam, if you get too hurt…” you could even put the thought into words. “I can’t—I will not be able to take it, and Harley needs me.”

“I can’t promise I won’t get hurt, but you have to know that I will take care, because I have something to come back to; you,” he took your hands in his and looked at you with deep eyes. “You rocked my world, you turned it upside down and I love every second of it—I know it sounds like I want my cake and eat it too, but please, we can do this.”

“You’re asking for way too much,” you shook your head. “I can’t do this…”

“You’re back!” Harley yelled from behind you two and ran towards Sam to wrap his arms around him. Sam lifted him up and held the boy tightly. “Are you two finally together again?”

“Babe, go back to bed, it’s late,” you gave him a stern look. “Sam and I are talking.”

“But you two are getting back together, right?”

“Harley—” you said.

“I don’t understand why you two make things so complicated,” he complained loudly. “You like each other, you love each other and that should be it,” he sighed heavily. “You’re making a big deal out of this, (Y/N). You miss him, and I do too, doesn’t that count? You said my opinion was important, and I don’t care if he is an avenger, I think that’s pretty awesome. Well, there’s my opinion—but you have to promise something, Sam,” Sam looked at your kid with attentive eyes. “Can you bring Captain America to dinner one day?”

Sam chuckled lightly and nodded. “Only if (Y/N) is on board.”

“I am not on board,” you folded your arms over your chest. “Sam, your work is not compatible with a family and I cannot let you into this already dysfunctional household.”

“Clint’s got a family. Three kids and a house in the countryside,” he hurried to say. “They all make it work, so you can’t say it’s destined to fail… I love you, (Y/N). I love you very much, and I want to make it work, do you want to make this work?”

“I do,” you sighed, feeling the tears pooling in your eyes, “but I’m scared, Sam,” your voice cracked. “What if one day you don’t come back?”

Sam broke the distance between you two and placed his hands on the sides of your face. He made you look at him and in that fraction of second, you realized that, no matter what, you wanted to be with him.

“I will always come back, for you and for Harley,” Sam whispered. “You two mean the world to me.”

“I swear to god, Sam Wilson…” you breathed and shook your head. You wrapped your arms around his torso and pulled him closer. You hadn’t realized how much you needed him until you had his breath against your skin. You loved him, and for him, you would’ve taken a bullet.

“So,” Harley’s voice took you two out of that beautiful moment, “can Captain America come for dinner one day?”

You laughed heartedly and made a beckoning sign at him to join in you that warm embrace. You placed a soft kiss on the top of his head and felt bubbly. Like you were watching the whole scene from outside. You were so happy, and nothing could ruin that.

* * *

“Is that a phone, Harley?” You asked, feeling a sudden anger run through your veins. Your voice was soft, but noticeably demanding. “I thought I said I would buy you a phone when you were older. Where did you get this?” He was silent, holding onto the mobile tightly. “Was it Sam?” Harley shook his head. “Harley, you need to tell me who gave you this.”

“Grandma did,” he said in a low, scared voice. “It was the phone she gave me on my birthday, the one you said no.”

You took a deep breath. “Why did she give you this?” You knew your mom way too well to have known this from the start. “Harley, answer me, please…” you sighed heavily. “Did she tell you why she giving you the phone?”

“Are you mad at me?” His eyes were watery, and you felt your heart breaking, so you toned it down a little.

“No, baby,” you kneeled in front of him and took his tiny hand in yours and kissed them tenderly. “But I thought we didn’t have secrets, and I feel like this is something you should’ve told me. If anything, I’m mad at grandma,” mad was probably an understatement, but the words you wanted to use were not suitable for a boy his age.

“Why?” Tiny sobs came out of his lips, and you instinctively kissed the top of his head.

“Because grandma and I had a deal,” you pressed his forehead against yours. “She was not supposed to see you unless I was there with you. When did you see her? And you’re not supposed to have a phone until you’re 10, come on Harls,” you clicked your tongue, “we’ve talked about this, you’re still 8.”

“She went to see me at school and gave me this,” he gulped. “Ms. Daniels spoke to her, I don’t think she knew that… Grandma told me not to tell you because you wouldn’t care, now that you’re with Sammy. She said it was our little secret.”

“Harls, above all things, it’s me who you should keep secrets with, not from. Listen to me,” you tugged at your bottom lip, “your grandma loves you a lot, but there’s a paper signed by your mommy that says that I am your guardian and the person you should be living with. It’s what your mom wanted, and the judge helped me remind your grandma about it. She looked at the paper, she read it very carefully, and even you got interviewed, remember?” Harley nodded. “Well, the judge’s verdict was that you had to live with me because it was good for you. You even said you didn’t want to live with grandma because you don’t really know her a lot, so…”

“I’m sorry, (Y/N),” Harley threw himself into your arms, crying his tiny heart out, and you couldn’t help but break down too.

“No, baby,” you shook your head and gently caressed the back of his head. “This is not your fault, okay?” You pulled away just enough to look at his face. “But I really don’t want you to keep any secrets from me, like ever again. I trust you to tell you my stuff, I expect the same from you, alrighty?” Harley nodded lightly. “Now give me that, I’m gonna send grandma a message—and say your goodbyes to it as well.”

Harley turned away to grab the object in question and handed it to you. You unlocked it and went straight to a messaging app to send an audio message. You didn’t even bother going somewhere else, you wanted to show Harley how civil you could be, hoping it would serve as an example for him.

“Hey ma, this is (Y/N). Look, it’s quite obvious I know all about the phone so I want to tell you a little something. I was not joking when I told you Harley couldn’t have a phone until he was 10, so I’m taking this away permanently. The three of us have a deal, a legal deal that you started and you lost,” you said in your best passive aggressive voice. “I’d really like that you call me first if you wanna contact Harley, and don’t worry, I’m gonna have Ms. Daniels know that you cannot go and talk to Harls, and of course, let the whole school know that too. We have an agreement, so please respect it, ma. You know how to find Harley, I will not forbid you to see him—I’d never do that, but please use the appropriate channels to communicate with him. I will dispose this phone and the card, so we both apologize in advance for all the trouble you went through, but we promise to recycle it. Take care, bye.”

You heard footsteps getting closer, only to find Sam with a bag of takeout McDonald’s on each hand. He leaned on the doorframe with a questioning look on his face.

“Who were you talking to?”

“My mom,” you shook your head lightly. “She’s been talking to Harley—I’ll explain that later,” you hurried to add when Sam’s face made, yet, another question. “She has held up her part of the deal. Why the food?”

“I just had a hunch you might needed it—both of you. Go wash your faces and do something about those puffy eyes, I’ll go get the table set,” he smiled and walked back to the kitchen.

“I love that man,” you sighed in absentmindedness. “And I love you too, but you know what?” You looked at Harley. “I love you more,” you whispered, eliciting a great smile from him. “That’s more like it,” you smiled too.


	11. The proposal

“Hey buddy,” Sam leaned on the door frame to Harley’s room.

The little boy was sitting on his desk while doing some late homework. You were at the office doing some extra hours, and luckily Sam was there to keep your boy company. The two of them would go pick you up afterwards, so Sam used the free time to talk to Harley about something he had been thinking for a while.

“Harley, I need to ask you something…” Sam said nervously.

“Yeah, okay,” Harley replied. “Is everything alright?” He sat on the bed and patted a spot next to him to make Sam sit.

“You know (Y/N) and have been together for quite a while now,” Sam continued, “and you’re the most important person in her life so… I need your permission to do something really crazy,” Harley opened his eyes in anticipation. “I want to marry (Y/N). I want to be with her for the rest of my life, but most importantly, I want the three of us to be a family.”

“Do you love her that much?”

“Yes—I do. She changed my life,” Sam smiled lightly. “Loving her is the easiest thing I’ve ever done. Your aunt is amazing, Harls, and I got very lucky with her.”

“Why asking me?”

“I told you, you’re the most important person in her life, and I wanted to know if you wanted me to be a part of your family—I cannot do this if you’re not okay with the idea.”

“Why the rush? You’ve only been together for a year… or are you counting the time you were apart?”

“There are things you do just because you want to,” Sam replied, shaking his head slightly. “I want to spend the rest of my life with your aunt because I love her. She makes me very happy, and I want to make her happy too.”

“Mmmm…” Harley hummed, as if he wasn’t really convinced by the answer he got. “I just want you to promise me one thing,” Sam nodded. “I don’t want you to hurt her,” Harley spoke calmly and way more mature than a kid his age. “I know you love her, and who wouldn’t, really? She’s very awesome.” He chuckled softly. “But I mean it, don’t hurt her, because if you dare to do it, I’m going to kill you. I think she’s been through enough for you to come and mess it up. We both have, in a way…”

“I would never,” Sam shook his head.

“Okay then,” Harley nodded. “I hope she says yes.”

* * *

  
A few days after your first anniversary with Sam, he took you and Harley to get some dinner at a fancy place. The two men in your life looked very ceremonial, and it kinda made you feel like you didn’t put too much effort on your outfit.

During dinner, they would share secrets right in front of you, and by dessert, you decided you had had enough of it.

“Alrighty, is either of you gonna tell me what’s going on?” You folded your arms over your chest and cocked an eyebrow. “Or are you going to keep the secrecy without me?”

“I think it’s time,” Harley looked at Sam with anticipation. “It’s now or never.”

“You’re right, little man,” Sam nodded. Then, he stood up and made you stand up with him. You were starting to freak out. “(Y/N),” Sam took a deep breath and grabbed your hand. “I do hope you know you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Not even in my wildest dreams I thought I would find a woman like you. I love you, and I think I’ve done it ever since we met at St. Jonh’s. I know we’ve had some trying times, but if there’s something I learnt from them is that I can’t stop loving you and that I can’t be without you anymore. Loving you is the most amazing thing I’ve done, and I don’t want to stop. I love you with your past, I love you with your present, I love with your mom and all, and if you let me… I want to love you in your future,” Sam slowly kneeled as he pulled out a tiny, Tiffany’s box, and as he opened it, a gorgeous ring was presented before your eyes. “(Y/N), do you wanna marry me? Harley already said yes, so it’s only you left.”

You looked at Harley, who nodded with excitement his tiny head. Then, you took your hand to your face and silently nodded. Sam slid the ring on your finger with shaky hands that matched yours. He rose from the floor and wrapped you in a warm embrace, an embrace that Harley joined not long after.

“I love you,” you said in a teary voice. “I love you so much, Sam Wilson.”

He dried the tears that adorned your cheeks with his thumb and kissed you softly. “I love you too, baby. I love you so much.”


	12. The confession

The day after Harley’s 10th birthday had arrived and you were still not ready. It had been two years since you told him you’d do it on this date, and you still hadn’t had gathered the guts to do it. The night before, you tossed and turned on your bed.

“Baby,” Sam sleepily said, rolling on his side to look at you—or try to, because the room was still completely dark, “you should really get some sleep, or at least not disturb mine. I got early work at the VA’s tomorrow.”

“Shit, I’m sorry,” you whispered. “I’ll go sleep in the couch,” you leaned to kiss his forehead and got out of the bed. You grabbed the blanket that rested at the foot of the bed and took it to the living room. 

Needless to say, it took you a long while to fall asleep, and when Sam left, it had felt like you didn’t sleep at all. You came back to your bed to try and get some more sleep. Harley climbed on your bed at around 11 am and you stayed together cuddling. He could tell you didn’t sleep at all, and he dozed off again for some minutes, and somehow, you dozed off with him too.

By 6 o’clock, you went to tell Harley to get ready. Sam cheered on you and told you everything was going to be alright, but then again you were still awfully nervous. You drove him to the restaurant he liked and after dessert, you handed him the last gift you had for his birthday.

“What is it?” He said as he held it in his hands.

“Well, open it up,” you saw his face lit up as he revealed a picture of his parents. It was a picture you took, and you loved it because it showed them as they truly were: a happy couple. “Do you like it?”

“Where did you find this?” Harley’s eyes were shiny with tears, and it hurt you to even think about the nasty things you were about to tell him. 

“I had it in my files,” you shrugged. “I think I never showed it to you, so I wanted you to keep it forever,” you smiled gently. “Okay, so this is it,” you sighed heavily. “I am ready to tell you everything you want to know.”

“Start at the beginning, why do you and grandma don’t get along?”

“Well, my parents got divorced when I was about your age, or maybe younger—it’s been a while,” you shook your head. “Thing is that I’d always had a great relationship with my dad—your grandpa, and he was my best friend. My mom, on the other hand, always made it clear that I was not her favorite. My sister, your mom, was. That created a rough relationship between us that lasted until we went to college together.”

“How?”

“I always wanted to be with my mom, to have a nice relationship with her. I was so jealous of your mom because they got along so well, and though I had everything I wanted with my dad, I always wanted to be in good terms with my mom and my sister.”

“What happened to grandpa?”

“He died, many, many years ago. Way before you were born, but if he were still alive, he would’ve loved you so much, because you’re great.”

“How did my mom meet my dad?”

“They met in high school, I think. Or at least we were in high school when he and I met. Harley was very kind, and he loved her a lot. They were so happy, and when they found out you were going to be born they got engaged. But your daddy had an accident—a car accident, and he died. Then your mom became really sad, and then she had you… there’s a thing that some women develop after their babies are born, and it’s called post-partum depression. Your mom had that, but not because of you, but because there were many things happening at that time…” you were starting to get to the part of the story you weren’t ready to tell.

“What happened to my mom, and how did I end up with you?”

“Harls, what I’m going to tell you next is something that I really wish it didn’t happen, but it did. When you were about to turn one, things for your mom got really difficult. Your dad’s family didn’t want to accept you, and since your mommy had to quit college, she went back to living with grandma, but she wasn’t as nice as before; she often criticized her for keeping you, and for being a single mom, and for being depressed. Your mom was really sad, and she didn’t want you to grow up with a sad mom, so… she took her life.”

“How did I end up with you?” He was trying really hard not to cry.

“Way before you came into this world, I think it was before college… your mom sat down with me to make things up. We talked about the things that hurt us about the other. We hugged and cried and promised each other we would never fight again. She confessed me she was pregnant and that in case of something happening to her or Harley, she wanted me to be with you. Your mom did leave me as your legal guardian, but you lived with grandma for about a year before you and I could live together… Harley, I was a drug addict. I was sick, and I couldn’t take care of you. My wakeup call was when I passed out in class. I’m not proud of it, Harls, but I made it through because I knew I had to take care of you to save myself. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me, and being able to see you grow up it’s probably the best thing I’ve invested my second chance in,” you reached out a hand on the table, but he seemed really reluctant to take it.

“Were you close to death?”

“A few times,” you nodded. Harley stayed in silence for a while. “Is there anything else you’d like to know?” The boy shook his head. “What are you feeling right now?”

“It’s a lot,” he sighed. “Can we go home?” He said after a while. You nodded and walked with him back to the car.

The ride home was completely silent, and not even the music you had on could make it less awkward. Harley looked through the window, and dried tiny tears every once in a while. Once you two arrived, he headed straight to his room without saying a word to anyone. Sam looked at you with worried eyes and made you a cup of tea.

“Do you think it was a mistake to tell him?” You sighed, warming up your hands with the cup. “Maybe he wasn’t ready for all that information…”

“Neither of you were ready,” Sam conceded, “but it was something you had to do. You did it, and that’s really brave of you. I’m proud. Harley will come around, he just needs some time.”

“What if he hates me after this?”

“He won’t,” Sam shook his head lightly. “What you two have is unbreakable. He loves you more than anything… besides, if he does hate you, where would he go? To his grandma’s house?” He chuckled, making you chuckle along. “Don’t worry, (Y/N). You’ll be fine.”

“Why is there a blanket and a pillow on the sofa?” You asked, squinting your eyes slightly. “Have you been naughty?”

“I figured that maybe Harley would want to get inside the bed, and that it would be weird if I’m there,” he shrugged casually. “He needs you more than I do tonight, I can share.”

“You’re amazing, Sam,” you placed a soft hand on his cheek and pulled him closer to you to kiss him. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, baby girl,” he smiled and leaned in to kiss the top of your head. “Now go to bed, I assume you didn’t get much sleep last night,” he patted your butt and made you go straight to your bed.

You tossed and turned in the darkness of your room. You wanted to go check on Harley, but you were sure he wanted some space, and you wanted to be with Sam, but what if he was right? You stayed there, staring at the ceiling with eyes wide open and sighed heavily. About an hour later, you decided to quit trying to sleep and turned on the light to check your phone; then, the door to your room opened and Harley walked inside.

“Can’t sleep?” He asked simply.

“Yeah,” you sighed. “What about you?”

“Can’t sleep either,” he climbed on the bed and laid next to you. “What about Sam? Why is he sleeping on the couch? Did he do something bad?”

“He thought you might have wanted to come here,” you replied. “Apparently he was right,” you chuckled softly. “Harley, I need you to understand how difficult it was for me to tell you all of the things I said earlier at dinner,” you gulped. “There’s a reason why I waited so long to tell you, and that’s because I was not ready, and I thought you wouldn’t be, and I’m so sorry if any of this hurt you.”

“It’s okay,” he looked at you and smiled gently. “I know you didn’t mean to hurt me, and you didn’t. Mom did what she thought it was best for her and for me, and that took me to you. I’m happy, (Y/N). I have two moms and I have two dads, and that far more than anyone can have. I love you, you’re my aunt and my mom and nothing is ever gonna change that.”

“You’ve grown so much, Harls,” you tugged at your bottom lip to hold back the tears. “I love you too. You’re _my_ boy.”


	13. Big brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Sam, are you gonna come back?” Harley burst through the door and startled you. “Are you guys okay?”
> 
> “Yeah baby,” you nodded.
> 
> “(Y/N) and I were just talking, but I’ll be right there buddy,” Sam let go of you and kissed the top of your head. “I love you,” he whispered.”
> 
> “Sam, before you go… discretion is key, alright?”
> 
> “You got it, boss,” he pointed a finger gun at you and clicked his tongue.

“Sam, I need a word with you,” you yelled from your room. Sam was in the living room, playing videogames with Harley, and since your voice was evidently serious, the older one ran towards you. “Close the door and sit down,” you demanded.

Sam felt scared, more so because you had been acting strange for about three weeks now. You were on edge, cranky and worst thing was that you had a clear idea of what was. You had seen this behavior before and you didn’t like where this was going.

“First of all,” you spoke calmly, “I wanna apologize for my behavior these past few days… or weeks. I have an explanation for it and I’m not sure you’re gonna like it.”

“What is it? What’s going on?”

“I’d rather show and not tell… wait here,” you went to the bathroom to pick up the evidence. You came back, hoping Sam was still alive in the room. “Here ya go,” you handed him the pregnancy test you bought a couple hours earlier.

“What’s this supposed to mean?” You rolled your eyes at the dumbness of the question. “(Y/N), I’m not kidding, what’s this supposed to mean, I see lines but nothing else.”

“Jesus, Sam,” you pinched the bridge of your nose. “I’m pregnant,” you whispered. “I don’t wanna tell Harley now because I’d like to get checked first, but we gotta tell him… Sam would you mind saying something? I feel like a have a shit load of things I could be answering from you, but you’re not giving me anything!”

“I’m sorry, I’m just a bit… surprised,” he shook his head. “Are you sure? Couldn’t this be like a false positive or something?”

“Yes, it’s like the third test this week,” you sighed and sat next to him. “Sam, I’m really pregnant…”

“But that’s good news…” Sam took your hand and gently squeezed it. “Right?”

“Yeah, I mean…” you tugged at your bottom lip. “It’s not bad… I’ve done this before,” you tilted your head to both sides.

“Babe, if you don’t mind me asking, weren’t you on the pill?”

“Uhhh no,” you shook your head. “I told you I was gonna stop like three months ago. You said it yourself, I was unbearable.”

“Shit, (Y/N), I forgot—I’m sorry, babe,” he covered his mouth and shook his head. “When are you going to see the doctor? I have to be there.”

“Damn right you do,” you chuckled. “It’s 2019, of course you have to be there. I made an appointment for next Wednesday, so I was thinking since you don’t work at the VA’s that day, we could go to the doctor, pick Harley from school and then break the news to him.”

“Yeah, that’d be good,” Sam said, in a relaxed voice. “I love you, you know that? And… I’m dying to see how gorgeous you’re gonna look with your baby bump,” he placed a hand on your belly and looked at you with loving eyes. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, baby daddy,” you smiled widely.

“Sam, are you gonna come back?” Harley burst through the door and startled you. “Are you guys okay?”

“Yeah baby,” you nodded.

“(Y/N) and I were just talking, but I’ll be right there buddy,” Sam let go of you and kissed the top of your head. “I love you,” he whispered.”

“Sam, before you go… discretion is key, alright?”

“You got it, boss,” he pointed a finger gun at you and clicked his tongue.

* * *

“Honey,” you patted the coffee table right in front of you, and Harley sat down on the wooden surface. “Sam and I need to tell you something very important—well, two things.”

“What is it?”

“Well, you know how you and I were a family, right? We were a small family, but Sam came along and our family got bigger,” Harley nodded calmly. “Well, now we have something to tell you… you’re gonna have a little brother or sister.”

“Really?”

“Yes,” you nodded. “I’m pregnant.”

“When did you find out?”

“About a week ago, but with Sam we went to the doctor today to see if things were alright, and they are… the baby is growing healthy, though I still need to be very careful these first few months, so that the baby can stay there.”

“How are we gonna call it?”

“We don’t know yet,” Sam shook his head. “But I was thinking that if it’s a girl, I’d like her to be called Sandra, like your mom… what do you say, little man?” You looked at Sam in awe and squeezed his hand gently.

“That’d be cool,” Harley cheered. “I always wanted to be a big brother! And what if it’s a boy?”

“I don’t know,” you shook your head. “I wasn’t even thinking about names, but we’ll think about it. All three of us.”

“Hey, what’s the second thing?”

“We might have to look for a new home,” you said.

“We’ll need one more bedroom, for the baby,” Sam nodded his head. “Unless you wanna share your bedroom,” he teased.

“A new place would be fine,” Harley hurried to say. “What are you planning to do with this place?”

“Probably sell it,” you replied. “It’s about time we get a place of our own and start over. Don’t you think?”

“Yeah, that’d be cool,” Harley said in excitement.


	14. Welcome home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’ll be an amazing dad, I’m sure.”
> 
> “I have someone to teach me,” he looked at you and smiled. “Because you’re already an awesome mom.”
> 
> “Oh… before I forget,” you hurried. “You should really get some sleep, this is the last piece of night you’ll have for the next… 10 years,” you chuckled softly. “Been there, done that.”

You’d done it. You’d just pushed out a human being out of your body, and all the pain your felt was now excitement, exhaustion and just plain happiness. You were sure you’d broken Sam’s hand by holding it too hard, but he was so emotional that, maybe, it just wasn’t important. 

You rested your head back in the pillow, feeling light-headed and dizzy. Though you knew your baby was safe with your midwife, you still wanted to hold her and try to feed her or something. You had read a dozen books on how to deliver a baby and what to do when the baby arrived to your arms, but all those words were gone and you just had one urgent matter in mind: your baby girl.

“You did it,” Sam pressed his forehead against yours while his hand was still well secured in yours. “You did it, mama,” his voice cracked. “I’m so proud, so damn proud of you.”

“How’s she?” You breathed, feeling alarmed at the incredibly loud cries that came out of a tiny baby. “Is she alright?” 

“She’s fine, she’s gorgeous, just like you. They’re gonna bring her in a few minutes because they have to clean her up.”

“Okay,” you mouthed. You couldn’t really get your voice out due to exhaustion. “Harley? Where’s he? Is he here?”

“He’s waiting outside with Steve and Nat,” you frowned in confusion. “They came to see you, hoping they would be the godparents of this baby… oh and speaking of,” he stepped aside to let the nurse in with your baby. 

“Okay, here she is,” the nurse said in a melodic voice. “Try to put your finger closer to her hand, so she can grab it, okay mama?” You nodded.

“Hey sweetie,” you greeted the tiny, swollen human in your arms. “Hey, Sandy, it’s very nice to meet you. You certainly took your time, didn’t you? What took you so long, honey?” You approached her hand with your free hand and grazed at her fingers. Sandy seemed to calm down and tried immediately to grab you. “Yes, baby, here I am.”

From afar, you overheard Sam talking to the nurse, but you couldn’t really understand what he was saying, all that mattered was your baby girl that rested comfortably in your arms. She was so tiny that you feared you would break her. She was still sobbing, but with your finger in her hands, she felt secure, apparently.

“I’m gonna go get Harls, alright?” Sam asked. “Be right back,” he placed a soft kiss on your forehead and got out. In a matter of minutes he was right back with your tiny man by the hand.

Harley walked carefully towards you and he smiled at you. “Is this…?”

“Yeah,” you nodded. “This is Sandra, your sister,” you smiled at him. “Sandy, this is your big brother, Harley.”

“You look tired, are you okay?” Harley worriedly asked, placing a hand on your forehead and brushing away some strands of hair from your face. “Do you want chocolate or something?”

“Yeah, but not right now,” you sighed and stroke his cheek gently and he placed his hand on top of yours. “It’s been a long day, right?” Harley nodded. “Harls, I need you to do me a little favor. I really don’t want you to spend the night here, it’s uncomfortable and it smells weird, so why don’t you and Uncle Steve and auntie Nat go to our place? You three can come back tomorrow when all of us are more rested, okay? I think I might want some chocolate tomorrow,” you chuckled weakly.

“Okay, I’ll let you two rest,” Harley nodded again. He kissed his palm and then pressed it against your sweaty forehead. “I love you, (Y/N). Bye, Sandy,” he said in a singing voice.

“I love you too, buddy.”

Harley got out of the room, and Steve and Nat came to say hi to you and the little girl. You tried to keep your best face, but you were completely beaten up. Luckily, they only stayed for a few minutes and then headed to your place with Harley. The nurse took Sandy away, allowing you your well-deserved rest.

Sam got ahold of a few more blankets and pillows to get you comfortable and laid on the futon next to your bed. The city lights came through a narrow gap between the curtains, and it gave the room a kind of orangey light that broke the darkness. 

“Sam,” you whispered. “Are you still awake?”

“Yeah, I’m too hyped to even close my eyes,” he rolled on his back to face you from his improvised bed. “You should get some sleep though.”

“I know, I just… I just wanted to thank you. For everything you’ve done for us… You mean the world to me, Sam, and diving into this adventure from the start wouldn’t be the same if I did it without you, and there’s no one else I’d like to do this with. ”

“I love you baby,” he chuckled. “I love you so much, thank you for having me join this crazy ride with you,” he reached out his hand to hold yours.

“I love you too,” you replied. “You’ll be an amazing dad, I’m sure.”

“I have someone to teach me,” he looked at you and smiled. “Because you’re already an awesome mom.”

“Oh… before I forget,” you hurried. “You should really get some sleep, this is the last piece of night you’ll have for the next… 10 years,” you chuckled softly. “Been there, done that.”


End file.
